Chi's Pen

Two weeks have gone by since I hit the publish button on my first blog post. When I say I was nervous, that is an understatement! It was early morning like 1 or 2 am and I was going back and forth with myself on should I hit publish or just keep procrastinating. The things that kept going thru my head were is anyone going to read it, is it going to make any sense to people, what if they don’t like it? That seems to have always been the thing that has held me back from doing things I know I can do but make me uncomfortable. Wondering what someone else is going to think about it or how someone else is going to feel about what I say.

I can give a good pep talk to everyone but myself. So finally here was my pep talk to myself “Listen Chi, it don’t matter what the people you worried about gone do or say because hey what they doing? If they have anything negative to say that’s on them, these are still your thoughts and they just mad cause you decided to do something with yours and they didn’t.” Funny right, but that’s how it has to be sometime, you gotta push yourself, if not who gone push you? Who is they anyway? Have you ever asked yourself that question, who is they and why are you worried about what they are going to say about what you do with your life and your feelings. I bet you they not worried about you so why be worried about them. I know it’s funny to say that because we all tend to be worried about what someone else is going to say about us, all the while their lives are in shambles or at best not in any position to concerned about somebody else.

So with my pep talk to myself I have decided to do some other things that I have been uncomfortable with in the past that keeps pushing me to get comfortable. Earlier in the year I took part in a writing challenge. My writings were only seen by my friends, the group that was hosting the challenge didn’t even get to see what I wrote because my pages were private. Well I decided to take part in another one and it is amazing. Looking at all the different people and different writing styles is great. I’ve been forced to open myself to people I don’t even know and it is scary but fun. Being pushed to a level I didn’t think I could go because I was holding my own self back. When I got my first comment, like, and follow from people I didn’t know I was on cloud nine. It is such an ego boost to know there are people you don’t know that will cheer you on and push you to get to places you never thought you could.

If you are feeling uncomfortable in your current space do that thing that you know will bring you a different level of comfort. It will be scary but do it anyway, it’s fun. Good Luck!!

Chi’s Pen